Hudson Valley Mountain River News
Satire You Can Trust
Meteorologists at the Hudson Valley Weather Service in New Paltz tracking a highly active high or low pressure system report our area could be catastrophically impacted or completely spared by …
Incoming Storm Could Dump 0-24” of Snow on Hudson Valley, Beginning Tonight or Never Read More
With each day bringing news of more deaths, higher unemployment and further extension of lockdowns with no end in sight, it’s only natural to search for a silver lining. Some …
Religious Groups, Hopeless Romantics Laud Return of Courtship in Age of Social-Distancing Read More
GARDINER- Hundreds of disrobed demonstrators converged on the grounds of the Mohonk Mountain House today to demonstrate against the decision this week to formally forbid nude sunbathing and skinny-dipping in …
Naked & Dismayed: Nudists Protest Mohonk Skinny-Dipping Ban Read More
KINGSTON- A 31-year-old Kingston man saved 5 cents today at the Hannaford grocery store on Ulster Ave. by carrying 13 grocery items in his arms from the store to his …
Ulster County Man Heroically Cradles 13 Grocery Items to Avoid 5-Cent Paper Bag Fee Read More
NEW PALTZ— Local sources report that the stars look “fucking amazing” tonight and that you should really go outside and check it out. “It’s so beautiful,” stated Victoria Sinclair, 21, …
Report: Stars Look Fucking Amazing Tonight Read More
KINGSTON- An investigation conducted by Hudson Valley Mountain River News has unveiled a vast network providing millions of dollars in books, movies, magazines, newspapers and passes to area cultural institutions …
Investigation: Vast Piracy Network Distributing Millions of Dollars in Books & Movies Across Hudson Valley Read More
A new year. A new decade. A chance to start again, and maybe, just maybe, take the lessons of the past and learn from them to become a little better, …
Kingston’s first pothole of 2020 born Read More
