Kingston Decides to Swap One George Clinton for Another

KINGSTON- In an effort to resolve the controversy over the historic statues at Academy Green once and for all, the Kingston Common Council voted this week to replace the statue of former New York Governor George Clinton with a statue of the Parliament/Funkadelic founder of the same name.

“Not only will this allow us to keep the same placard and adjacent street name unchanged, it also increases our city’s funkiness immeasurably and fully aligns with our ‘One Kingston Under the Groove’ master plan,” said Mayor Steve “Atomic Dog” Abelard.

Common Council Minority Leader Denice “The Long-Haired Sucka” Brown agreed. Speaking from UCAT’s flagship bus, renamed The Mothership, Brown said the move is tantamount to dropping a “50,000 megafunk bomb on racism” and will advance the cause of “free minds and free booties” citywide.